Buddy, Ole Pal

January 15, 2013

I work very hard to have a good relationship with my kids.

Each one of them is very different and they all have unique needs & personalities.
I have invested much time and effort into getting to intimately learn the heart of my littles.

I love that I can interact with them beyond the borders of parent and child.
There is a certain element of friendship in my connections with my kids.

But what happens when they take advantage of that special aspect of our alliance?

Somehow, respect tends to fall by the wayside as a more casual rapport develops.
They become distracted by the fun part of "us" and lose sight of the authority in my role.

That is a painful part of the benefits of being a buddy.
So, should I just cut out the casual and go for the business-only approach?

I think that it's important in building trust to have that give and take with my kids.
It's a good thing for them to be able to cut loose and be playful with me, and vice-versa.
But, they've got to learn that respect is always a key element between us.
There is a certain respect that they are to give me always,
just like there is a certain respect that they expect from me.

Some people may disagree with me and say that it is not possible to be a good parent and be a friend to your child(ren).
I say that you can, as long as you maintain a clear boundary and that they know that the parent trumps the friend.

"and so train the young women to love their husbands and children," Titus 2:4

"for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." 2Timothy 1:7

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." Ephesians 4:29-32

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