September 28, 2011
I have all these grand ideas. Plans. Schedules. Charts. Notice the "s" on the end of each. Yes. I'm talking plural. My intentions are always true and pure. I want to make things run more smoothly. I want to give more. Complain less. Yell less. Be a source of more happiness. Be frugal and efficient. I have determination. I organize my thoughts and my life. At least I try to as best as I can. I make commitments to do X, Y, and Z. And then, a funny thing happens. Life gets me all tangled up. It swallows me. It beats me down and tears me up. I get tired. Lose my energy. And then, my grand plans get dropped by the wayside. Not on purpose. Not that I wasn't serious when I made "The Decision" to do "Whatever" it is that I'm convinced will enrich lives and bring glory to God. I just realize that I don't always have as much control over things as I would like to think that I have. I cannot do it all all of the time. And I've discovered that sometimes, I'm not supposed to.
So, do I give up on it all? Do I quit trying? Throw away my lists and schedules and charts? {My kids are all on their knees with knuckles glowing white, praying to God that I do!} No. I won't quit trying. It's who I am right now. It's who I've been for a while. I just need to keep trying. Push past the way it feels forced when I'm trying something new. When I fail, I need to remember to forgive myself. It's not a reflection of who I am. It just reminds me of Who I need. "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil." Ephesians 6:10-11 I must recognize that I am not a failure, it's just that the devil is working overtime to sabotage all that is done in the name of Jesus. He strips us naked. But, you know what- I've been naked often. It's not such a big deal anymore. I just need to get Dressed again.
"Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved." Psalm 55:22
"No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." 1Corinthians 10:13
"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope," Romans 5:3-4
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