You Want Some Cheese with That Whine?

July 20, 2010

My blog has never been intended to be a place for me to rant. But, sometimes, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

I am feeling very frustrated. I look around me and see bowls & plates of food everywhere! Glasses and glasses of juice scattered about. Shoes- don't get me started on shoes! Snack wrappers are not only on the floor of the boys' room (who are not supposed to eat or drink in their room by the way), but they are all over the living room and kitchen. Food is scattered on the floor throughout the house. Wet towels & swimsuits and dirty socks are lying on the floor waiting for mold and rot to set in. Sounds like I haven't cleaned in a few days, huh? Well, it looks like it, too. But, the sad truth is that I picked up and did all the dishes after supper- this all happened after that! And, what's worse- this happens every single day. No matter how much I clean or don't clean.

A common scene in my house looks like this: I tell the boys to clean their room. They go in it for a while, all the while fussing because the other one is not cleaning. After a while, they come out like they're done. Then, when I notice it's not done I get this big ole song and dance about how they cleaned but the other one made the mess and yada yada yada! But, if I fuss about it, then "all (I) ever do is fuss, no one listens 'cause everyone is tired of the fussing." So, what is the answer? Do I give up? Do I concede and just put on a little black (maid) uniform? Do I let them become lazy, entitled, selfish, disrespectful adults? Do I let the filth take over their room until the board of health makes us move out and condemns our house?

I am just in one of those "ruts" that I have talked about in the past. I feel like it doesn't matter what I do or don't do because tomorrow everything is gonna look the same or worse than it does today. Nobody cares enough to even try to keep up after themselves. I don't know how to get any of them to understand that even though it is my job to keep up the general housework, I still need them to pick up after themselves so that I have the time and energy to be able to do fun stuff with them instead of always fussing about what needs to get done in the house. It absolutely drains me more than it annoys them!

I feel defeated and disrespected. It makes me angry that they think I am nothing more than a nagging maid because they cannot seem to get their own trash in the garbage can. Most of the time I have to tell them more than once to let the water out of the bathtub when they're done bathing! I think that what bothers me the most in all of this is that I am the bad guy because all I ever do is fuss! You think I want to fuss? No! I want everyone to do what they're supposed to do. Then maybe, I wouldn't be so "yucky". I have all but given up on this house. I feel like I am on a sinking ship, like I am fighting a losing battle. The last thing I want is for my days to focus around the housework, but, it has to get done! I could easily sweep 5 times a day. I feel like I am constantly doing dishes. We have a bottomless laundry basket! What's strange is that those are not the things that get to me. What gets me is the fact that no one tries to pick up after themselves. Okay- in fairness, it's not no one, it's mostly the boys.

I don't want this to continue on the road it's on. I want to get my housework done just like I always have in the past with a happy heart. I don't want to be filled with dread and exhaustion like I am now. I don't want it to be the "issue" at our house all the time! So, I guess it's time for a different course of action.

Step one- Identify the problem. I need my boys to take initiative. I need them to actually clean their room when I tell them to. I need them to let the water out of the bathtub when they're done bathing without being told. I need them to put their dirty dishes in the sink when they're done. I need them to throw their trash in the garbage can right away. I need them to put their dirty clothes in the hamper right away. Step two- Identify the solution. I have tried fussing. That does not work. Punishing them does not work because some way or another the punishment doesn't stick- we cannot be consistent (that's a whole other story). So, I am gonna try Red Ruby (aka the fly swatter). Hopefully, it will be effective, because I am not sure that I have a "plan D".

If you have read this far- thank you! You are a saint! LOL! If you have any advice, PLEASE, feel free to leave it for me. I need as much support and encouragement as I can get.

"Train a child up in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6


TAMS said...

I need to get me a Red Ruby too! Mason seems to be slacking in his time available to clean his room, yet finds time to play the Wii or Nintendo everyday...yikes! Whats a mother to do?! I feel your pain! LOL

Wendy said...

I know having 4 kids it much more difficult than having 1 but what I have found helpful is to make cleaning as fun as I can. We crank up the radio or tv on our favorite music station and clean and dance!! It sounds goofy but it works. Now for them picking up after themselves, that's a different story, when u figure that one out please let me know, lol!!! I really enjoy your blogs!!