A Breath of God

August 10, 2010

Oftentimes, as I lie in bed at night waiting for sleep, I have a thought that goes something like this~ "You were just here last night, in this house, in this bed, thinking the same thoughts. Another today is over. Remember, not that long ago, lying in this same place, wondering about the baby in your pregnant belly? Your baby is 2-1/2 years old now. Wow! Time is flying by way too fast." I have to actually stop myself from thinking the next thoughts that try to enter into my mind~ thoughts about what it will be like when the kids are grown with kids of their own and Freddie and I are old and gray, because I am afraid that tomorrow night, when I lie down, those thoughts will have come true. It is actually a little frightening to me.

Have you ever heard the saying, "the days were long, but the years were short"? Well, this is exactly how I feel. I want to slow the clock down somehow. I do look forward to my kids growing into themselves and having all those exciting experiences along the way as they create families of their own. But, I don't want the time with them in my home to end.

I just get so consumed with the tasks of each day, that I often take for granted that they will never be this age ever again. I want to try to make an effort to breathe them in a little longer each day before it ends. I want to make sure that I hold on to that hug for a few extra seconds when I sense them (or me) first begin to pull away. I want to make sure that when they talk to me, I stop what I'm doing and really pay attention to them so that they know that I hear them and that what they have to say is important to me. A few seconds delay in housework is not going to make a difference in what time I go to bed at night, but, it might make a difference in how my kids feel about themselves!

"Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered, and that my life is fleeing away. My life is no longer than the width of my hand. An entire lifetime is just a moment to you; human existence is but a breath." Psalm 39:4-5

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